Shadow Boxer.

I’ve made this elaborate plan,

twisted it around all that I am;

in the clutches of a weakened hand,

in the trenches of a war-torn land;

various feelings I don’t comprehend,

strangely flowing through my system;

creeping insidiously toward a resolution,

shifting deeply toward my brainstem;

I’ve set these goals in my dark mind,

to slice away the ties that bind;

to execute the hostage after all this time,

set fire to all things I’ve guarded with my Life;

watch it burn and crumble in such a losing fight,

cut my nose clean off the face of my own spite;

see the way I falter as Life punches out my lights,

see the misery that is my only true birth right.

 

12 thoughts on “Shadow Boxer.

  1. doubtpuppet says:

    Love this kind of poetry – it really reminds me how I’ve written about OCD(sorry to sound like a broken f’ing record with that but it’s true). I get some of the metaphors cos I aim for the same kind of things. I probably don’t get them all though cos I’m notoriously shite with metaphor!
    With that in mind, ahem, I thought mayebe the last bit was about you stopping responding to the PTSD the way you normally would and letting it run its course. i.e. a therapeutic tool for letting the fear wash overr you without reacting(a bit like ERP therapy) – to the sufferer it feels like defeat, giving in, but if it can be endured, it can lead to benefits – like freeing the hostage, severing the bonds.
    Also shadow boxer is a great metaphor for PTSD(and OCD “Shut up about OCD already!!!” “OK! jeez”).
    So yeah, rockin good poem. Sweet picture too.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Empowering thoughts at their finest!

    Liked by 1 person

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